The most important person in my life is the one who gave me life, that special someone who raise me and never let me down that's my beloved mother. She's live in our house absolutely but my mother's province is in Negros Occidental and people call her Neth base on her name Nanette and I would like to Introduced to you my beloved and the best mother to me. Sometimes she is so strict to me but i know my mother do that for my own good and I understand she know what best for me. But sometimes I don't listen to her because i feel that she treated me like a child but i know to myself that I'm more mature and I can take care of myself but in the end of the day i realized that i have listened to her because she know what best for me and never put me into danger and I'm very thankful to God because he gave me a one of a kind mother. My mother loves to cook specially my favorite dishes like Bicol express, Tinolang manok it taste so delicious. She's very quite person she's not that kind of mother that shout you if she angry but instead she will not talk to you and I know that she's hurt inside and I see that in her eyes. I love my mother so much not only her but my family also my father my sister and my brother. If I could live again as a new person I will still choose them as my parents.
1. Some of your sentences contain two or more ideas. You could cut them into two or more simpler and shorter sentences.
ReplyDelete2. The last two sentences do not talk about your mother but your family as a whole. Remember, the last part of your composition should summarize or conclude whatever you have discussed in your body. You should not be introducing a new idea in this part.
Rating:
a. Introduction – 3
b. Content – 9
c. Conclusion – 2
d. Diction – 3
e. Coherence – 3
f. Spelling – 3
g. Mechanics and grammar – 4
h. Legibility – 3
Total: 30/60
Rating:
ReplyDeletea. Introduction - 3
b. Content - 10
c. Conclusion - 2
d. Coherence - 3
e. Diction - 3
f. Spelling - 3
g. Grammar and Mechanics - 4
h. Legibility - 3
Total - 31/60