Wednesday, February 1, 2012

The kind of life I have today is very different from my life before

The kind of life I have today is very different from my life before when i was in high school I was a kind of student who don't take seriously in my studies. I want to passed all my subjects but I don't want to exert more effort to pass. When I was in my high school I want to play computer games, sleep in the middle of the class. But when I enter my college life every things change everything I have to be hardworking, and take my studies seriously because my parents said that is hard to study but it is very hard that you don't have education in your life. When my parent says that I realized that my parents right I have to study hard to prepared for my future and i realized that i have to throw away all of my bad stuff I do in my high school life.

1 comment:

  1. This is good for a paragraph but the assignment is a five-paragraph essay.

    You could have strengthened your composition by pointing out the main points and supporting them with extended narration.

    Grammar points:

    - to passed [to pass], to prepared [to prepare] the infinitive always take a verb in the base form)

    Rating:

    1. Intro & T.S. - 4/10
    2. Body - 14/30
    3. Conclusion - 4/10
    4. Organization & Structure - 4/10
    5. Diction - 5/10
    6. Grammar/Spelling/Mechanics - 10/20
    7. Legibility - 6/10

    TOTAL - 47/100

    ReplyDelete